I had my internal salt water "bath" and didn't hate it too much. I then alternated between 40 ounce bottles of "lemonade" and 48 ounce bottles of water, three times throughout the day. I put in my contacts for improv class, and because of that as much as because of the coming rain (and perhaps the hunger), I got a headache, and it got worse and worse. By the time I went to bed my brain was really fucking with me. The headache was up to migraine proportions, though it was the entire top of my head and not focused in my left eye as my migraines are, and I almost had an anxiety attack. This had to do a little bit with looking at a website that talks about going off of the fast, about slowly working your way back to real food. I started tripping, thinking I needed food RIGHT THEN and all these fears came back. It's a loss of control, really, something I struggle with a lot in my life: giving it up. I went to bed at 9 p.m. and woke up five times in the night to pee, and each time until 6:30 I still had the headache. But now it's 7:15 of DAY TWO and I have no headache, I feel fine. I just finished my yummy internal salt water "bath" and I'm getting ready to do some work and start on my first "lemonade."I realized yesterday morning as I lay in bed getting ready for DAY ONE that I asked my mom out for a Mother's Day lunch, and that would be on DAY NINE, and Steven convinced me that it might make her feel self-conscious if I were to just sit and watch her eat, so this is only gonna be for three days. In the middle of the night last night I was thinking I needed to get off of this TODAY, but this morning is a new day and I feel much better.
